KATU

“There’s a big difference between someone in their early 50s and even someone in their sixties when it comes to dating and what are we looking for in a relationship,” says Ann Reichardt, the author of THE DANCE CARD: Looking for Love After Divorce.

“The whole idea of wanting someone in your life changes as you get older,” says Ann Reichardt. “Ten years down the road after my divorce, I want a companion and someone who is going to be there for me and who is a normal sexual being too.”

“I wrote my book to give people inspiration to go out there and break those barriers to find someone again. Sometimes after divorce, we don’t allow ourselves to do that and we are afraid to be hurt again. We don’t want to online date because of fear of being hurt. Or we ask ourselves, ‘What do I have to gain?’ There’s a lot to gain in terms of enjoying every moment of your existing life rather than sitting home and being lonely.”

“You don’t want to be miserable the rest of your life; open yourself up to an individual who will provide momentary pleasure without long-term goals. It doesn’t have to be long-term when we get older. We can have many people in our lives. We put ourselves in a mold where we can only be happy with one person and believe that if we are with one individual we have to end up with that individual as a life-long partner.”

“My book chronicles the different experiences I’ve had with different men and I enjoyed all of them. I’ve enjoyed everyone in a different way because they all have different personalities and I’ve used what I’ve learned from each relationship to understand who I am as a person now. I’m discovering what I need and what I want through all the different relationships. Even though none have worked out, they were all very important steps to take to get to where I am now in my mindset in terms of a long-term partner.”