In love and in life we are challenged to the core. Our knee jerk instincts on issues and feelings are pushed around against our wills at times. I had a lot of knee jerks in the past 8 years. I had danced with many guys throughout my search for that perfect partner. I was stronger now and had learned a lot about dating and the importance of being selective in choosing the appropriate man for me.

Decision making in finding a promising relationship through online dating gives us all more romantic options than previous generations. In my ” senior years” I unraveled important clues before taking the plunge. Know who you are, independent of someone else. Do not idealize a relationship. Compromise is key. A persons internal values become more important than the superficial attributes.

I identified styles and personalities and shared familiar events or stages in life became important in determining success or failure in a successful relationship. Breaking down our walls of pain and apprehension, letting go of the wounds of the past help in moving forward in a positive way.

After reflecting on those past years I wiped away the tears and thought of my former husband again. It was clear that I’d always refer back to him. He used to be that guy that I could rely on and come to over those marital years.He couldn’t be there for me anymore and I respected that and his new life.

Continuing my search for love was a job at times but mostly a fun journey. One that helped me discover who I am and what I want in a relationship.  I danced a lot with many dancers. I hoped that I too was an important part in helping them figure out who they were looking for as well. We were all learning, evolving. I still hadn’t found the right dancer but I was determined to continue this quest of finding that partner that would complete my dance of love and life.